Forgiveness

FORGIVENESS is a basis simple thing we all have to practice in our daily life. As "human is err", each of us could do mistake intentionally or accidentally in our life. Then, what needs us to forgive to our offenders? I was listening a dhamma while I am ironing yesterday. V Sayadaw is trying to explain how important forgiveness is in our life. He stresses that forgiveness doesn't mean he is taking superior hand or kneeing toward offender. We cannot forgive somebody without having internal power. It is so much powerful to forgive to people but not to forget. We got to take some lesson from the incidents we have been suffering for.

In fact, if there is something wrong, the problem exist on both side, regardless of magnitude. Some victims might be naive and purely sufferer by others' conduct. But mostly by two sides. Lets say somebody abuses us somewhat and it is not belong to us until we accept it. By Buddhist way, whatever we don't accept "U" turn to original givers. But patient to such abuse is easier said than done. We need to practice through our Buddha teaching. It take some time but possible to achieve a great mind who can easily forgive somebody. Unfortunately, most of offenders are our closet friends or relatives or even spouse. It reflect that the more we love, the more we suffer. The list is led by Parent and followed by siblings, relative, teacher, colleagues, peers and closed by ourselves. This show, our loved ones are more likely to be our offenders because we usually live together, work together and spend much time in our life. It is hard to get annoyed from strangers. 

How can we achieve the heart that can forgive people? Only through dhamma way and it need time to practice if we really want to have one. When our mind reach some level, we don't need to forgive unnecessarily. Because, nobody can make us angry or annoyed when our mind are peaceful. There would be no argument, not fighting, no debate, no jealous, then where for conflict between us. Most of conflict came due to some form of self-interest. When our mind free from wanting, it is quite clear that no need to forgive people because, he or she needs not angry by external factors.