where's life's value

I was converted to a monk for a week during my 2 week holiday. It was really peaceful moment for me to go through. Only the position able to stay away from computer, mobile and internet alone make my life quite different. It is indeed holistic way to spend time like that. Everyday, I spent my time in meditation and listening dhamma lectures alternatively. As a monk, I need to wake up early to fulfill one of disciplines by going out somewhere to collect rice by people who offer. Everyday, the place changes and it make me explore the life of people from my native small town. I noticed that people are generous despite they are poor mostly. It is not easy to offer hundreds of monk by daily basis unless they have not enough generous and kindness. As a Buddhist, we all make sure to donate first before we consume our foods or things. What a lovely culture is it? I got more time to think of life as I have nothing to do about my work. I tried to behave like real monk despite temporary term. Tried to understand the art of meditation as much as possible. Tried to listen dhamma sound to calm my mind. Tried to talk resident monks to learn their experience and life. 

I conclude my fellow monk's life as a peaceful life despite they are not as rich as I am. I got almost everything a man can own by material wide. But I asked myself if I am as happy as them. Definitely not. But knowing have to go back work after two week holiday make me feel stupid man. As a married man, I got obligation to support my family in which my wife and 25 months old daughter. It make me feel not ready to adapt a monk life with full time basis. I appreciate the time I stay at monastery. It is healthy and mindfulness time indeed. That particular week teach me that I don't need everything to survive in life. What matter most is to tame ourselves to become contented person. When we could have some power to kill our unstoppable greedy mind, we might have found a time of happy. Hopefully, I could one day able to possess such life without needing me much effort to do so. It need only practice and practice will make us perfect. Keep our mind free from worry and jealousy, then we have reached some level of human highness. It is not so difficult if we want to learn Buddha theory. The different is we can't find time for ourselves by throwing our life to a material needed world. At the end of the day, the solution is within ourselves.